Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Saturday, October 13, 2012
Forward
Not unlike the image to the left, we often seem to find
ourselves in the midst of a fog. Between the stresses of circumstances, the
demands of family, work, bills, and the chaos of Murphy’s Law we cannot see
much further than the end of our toes. And even they seem a bit murky and just
a little out of focus; as for that next step, well it appears to disappear into
the mists. Added to the fog is the reality that we never seem to be able to
stroll pleasantly through the fog, but rather are forced to sprint head-on into
the unknown. Yet, we face decisions daily that have grave consequences – for us
and for those we love. How do we move forward…
Discovering a way forward…light in the darkness
One of the issues I find in my own life when I attempt to
move forward is that I am trying to figure it all out myself. What I mean is this;
it is incredibly difficult to figure out what needs to happen when I am caught
up in my own opinions and convictions. There is no mediating voice if it is only
me. I used to like the analogy of needing a mirror, something that can reflect
back to us what is really real – not just the way we feel or think. However,
even this is not enough, for it is still us that are looking into the mirror
and we are still seeing with same set of eyes, the same set up categories,
experiences etc…What we need is a conversation partner.
We do not need a yes man or women, we need someone who knows
more than we do, communicates better than we do, understands us better than we
do, and loves us enough to intervene, gently, in our lives. The easiest analogy
is often the role parents were meant to play. Yet, even they are not enough.
They too are merely human. They, like ourselves, our caught up in their own
stories, struggle with sin, and are
shaped by their past and their experience. What we desperately desire is
transcendence; someone who is able to be above it all, to see clearly, to know
what is right and true even prophetic. We also need someone who is with us.
Someone who can empathize with our pain, understand our temptations and
struggles, and cares deeply about our soul. We need a divine conversation
partner, who is also one of us. A partner who is us. We need the transcendent
to become immanent. It is the testimony of the Scriptures to reveal such a man.
“In the Word became flesh and dwelt among us”, (John 1:14) and we enter into the
conversation, the dialogue, as the power of the Holy Spirit speaks in and
through the Scriptures. But more than that Jesus did not leave us alone, but
gave us the Church – namely that community that is meant to put flesh and blood
to the good news of the gospel and minister in His name. The community called
into existence by the Holy Spirit, led by Christ, and where his presence
dwells.
It is in this community that a way forward takes on a
practical and tangible reality. Jesus calls us out of our isolation and
independence into the life-giving interdependence of a community created by
him, for him, and maintained in him. He continues to be our conversation
partner, our “true mirror” as we interact in this community, hear the Word
preached, partake in the sacraments, and submit to his authority. The way
forward is a way revealed by faith and worked out in community.
Melody and I have once again discovered our desperate need
for Christ and his community. As we have continued to pray and look for a
church home I am continually struck at the significance of the investment many
of you have had and continue to have in my life. We cannot overestimate the
eternal significance of those we meet who are willing and called to walk beside
us in this life. We are not just friends, we are brothers and sisters in the
Lord and we are co-heirs together with Him.
24 And let us consider how we may spur one another on
toward love and good deeds, 25 not giving up meeting together, as some
are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you
see the Day approaching.
Hebrews 10:24-25
Friday, September 7, 2012
Faith & Fear...the rubber and the road
“…but
also in the heart of a father’s affection, to charge and exhort them to
remember “that the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom[1]”’
I do not remember clearly the day that I first heard or read
the Scripture passage quoted above. Yet, I remember two things as if they were
yesterday. The first, is as a child reading 1 Samuel 3 and the account of
Solomon’s request for wisdom above all the other things in this world, and the
second, finding in my earthly father a pattern to follow. Faith has been
described in many ways. We often throw “faith” and “believe” around as if all
it takes to solve the pain, hurt, and frustration in life is to close our eyes,
bury our heads, hearts, and minds and expect it all to be okay. As many of us
know and have experienced life is more precious, pain more intense, and life
more complicated than for blanket platitudes. The God we serve is too real for
that…
Intrinsically we understand fear, frustration, and
pain. It is not something we must
be taught or learn in a classroom. In moments of fear we often encounter for a
brief moment the fragility and brevity of life. Suddenly, life becomes more
real, perhaps, even more true. Yet, fear can also paralyze and even
incapacitate us. Fear exists when the circumstances of life run head-on into
our inadequacies. When life spirals out of control, when things seem to fall
apart all around us, when everything we do seems ineffective and doomed to
failure, and when everyone seems to know right where we are inadequate, then
fear is unavoidable. How then do we move when faced with our fears? The
question is not how to ignore, avoid, or even how to move in spite of our
fears. The question is how do we move into and through those fears.
So why faith? How is faith not simply another mental
exercise to avoid the problems we face? Or not simply positive thinking? What
is so different about our faith? I always believed faith and fear were
opposites. Yet, God is teaching me
that biblically it is not faith or fear; it is who you fear most and who you
have faith in. If your faith is only in yourself then you have every right to
fear. We are small creatures tossed to and fro on the winds and waves of life. There
hardly ever appears anything about our lives that if shaken cannot be moved.
Yet, we are continually told that if you believe in yourself you can and will
succeed. In fact, this faith in the individual’s significance, power and
control happens to be an essential part of being an American. There is no other
doctrine that has been promulgated so deep and wide. This core belief
penetrates even the most remote area’s of our hearts and souls. We are taught
to perform, to overcome. Obstacles simply make us stronger, more independent.
We fight, and die believing and having faith in ourselves. When fear comes,
when the doubt slips in, when we are terrified the solution is simple – just
believe in yourself. Yet, there appears nothing within me that bears this
confidence. The empirical logic all around me screams the opposite. I am not
that strong, I am not that smart, I am not that athletic. I don’t look like a
celebrity. In fact our entire cultural seems hell-bent on proving that although
I am not enough I certainly must believe I am. In other words, the game seems
to be keeping me thinking that if I just tried a little harder, bought a few
more things, worked a little more, made just a little bit more than it could be
mine. Yet, the simple truth remains – I am afraid, because I know my own
inadequacies.
These past few weeks have been some of the most fearful of
my life. I would not say I fear many things, but I do fear failure. I fear failure
in the eyes of my wife, my family, and perhaps most importantly failing in my
own eyes. There has been no doubt in my mind that I am called to be at
Gordon-Conwell and to pursue my theological education. I have no doubt that God
has promised to meet the needs of those he has loved and called according to
his purpose. Yet, there is a difference between believing those two statements
individually, and experiencing them. Rubber meets the road…
“The Lord is my light
and my salvation;
whom shall I fear?
The Lord is the
stronghold of my life;
of whom shall I be
afraid?” [2]
The faith we have requires us to face our inadequacies and
fears head on. It cannot be nor cannot remain a mental exercise removed from
the harsh realities of life. For if our faith remains in our own strength and
abilities, our fear only grows. Yet, the promise of God is that if we remain in
Him, our faith will grow and our fears be removed. Raising support is a true
test for Melody and I. It requires that we trust in the promises of God more
than we trust in our own abilities. It means we take him at his word, that he
will never leave us nor forsake us. And we wait, pray, watch, and rejoice.
But if God so clothes
the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the
oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? 31 Therefore do not be anxious, saying,
‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ 32 For the Gentiles seek after all
these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. 33 But seek first the kingdom of God
and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you[3]
[1]
William J. Federer, Great Quotations: A
Collection of Passages, Phrases, and Quotations Influencing Early and Modern
World History Referenced According to Their Sources in Literature, Memoirs,
Letters, Governmental Documents, Speeches, Charters, Court Decisions and
Constitutions (St. Louis, MO: AmeriSearch, 2001).
[2]
The Holy Bible: English Standard Version
(Wheaton: Standard Bible Society, 2001), Ps 27:1.
[3]
The Holy Bible: English Standard Version
(Wheaton: Standard Bible Society, 2001), Mt 6:30–33.
Wednesday, August 22, 2012
Arriving & Waiting
And the king, and all the people who were with him, arrived weary at the Jordan. And there he refreshed himself. [1]
“Be still, and know that I am God.
I will be exalted among the nations,
I will be exalted in the earth!” [2]
Commit your way to the Lord;
trust in him, and he will act.
6 He will bring forth your righteousness as the light,
and your justice as the noonday.
7 Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him;
fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way,
over the man who carries out evil device[3]
It seems in the past few years my mind wanders again and again in amazement to the speed life seems to be approaching. I am constantly reminded of a scene and Ray Bradbury’s work Fahrenheit 451… In the scene the main character Guy Montag drives by a billboard on the freeway and casually describes it as over 200ft long – not for the information on it, but because the speed of the cars makes anything smaller impossible to read. Does it take a 200ft billboard to get our attention? Are our lives moving so quickly, filled with so many commitments, stretched in so many directions, and moving so quickly that even friends and family have to stick up billboards to get our attention? Are we so busy checking our clocks, phones, agendas, and email that we fail to notice others?
Major life events fill the last two years of my life. From my Father passing away to meeting and marrying the love of my life to relocating 1,000 miles from the place I called home for the past 4 years, my life seemed to be in constant motion. Yet, a question comes to mind, so when do we stop? Does busyness cloud our lives and hearts? The Scriptures constantly remind us of our need for rest. It seems to be that the greatest “sin” in my world is to be labeled “unproductive”. The pressure from within and from without seems to scream, “Why aren’t’ you doing something productive? Do something constructive with your time! Don’t just sit there?!” and so I find myself into a vicious cycle – constantly seeking rest I force myself into constant motion.
Suddenly the commands of God become life itself. How often do we forget that the Sabbath was given for man not man for the Sabbath? That a day of rest was a gift to the people of God, because we have a God that can grant it! Our rest is in Him, in Christ, because he is the King of Kings and Lord of Lords. We are able to rest from our labors, worries, anxieties, and fears. We are able to rest from the chaos and confusion. We are to rest from doing so that we might discover again the relationship that brings life. Whether it’s a day, an hour, or even minute-by-minute Christ brings rest from even the sin and idol of production and when we discover that we just might discover again the relationships around us. We might discover what we have been missing all along.
This is something that is an ongoing battle for me. After the rush and chaos of what seems like 8 months of non-stop doing, my wife and I find ourselves waiting. Since moving from Atlanta to South Hamilton we have been in a holding pattern waiting…. It seems we were in a mad rush reached our destination and then were told, “alright now wait”. As it turns out neither one of us handle waiting to well. Yet, God is lovingly teaching us to wait!
but they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength;
they shall mount up with wings like eagles;
they shall run and not be weary;
they shall walk and not faint. [4]
South Hamilton
Thank you to everyone for their support, prayers, and encouragement! Here are a few pictures of the campus!
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